what the dreams seem to say

And by dreams, I mainly mean nightmares, but they have similar themes and images and this is what I can see:

It is something masquerading as something else.

It is not what it appears.

It is very old/ancient.

It threatens the very depth and core of me, body and identity.

It seems to be from Africa. (Though now I also see how my childhood, how old Virginia was like Africa in some ways, the jungle, and black-skinned people who had not so long before been in Africa, my totem lion, my time in the woods, apartheid, isolation, the food chain...)

It has that voodoo aspect.

That masquerade aspect.

That jack-in-the-box who has left its box aspect.

It wants in.

It waits in doorways.

It terrifies me.

It gives me night terrors, wakes me drenched in sweat, and makes my days like a bad strange dream.